BLOG » the blind leading the blind (part 25):
1. don’t party/socialize your life away. this is a very possible danger and should be avoided at all costs. there will always be another party. so pick and choose wisely. even though it might seem boring, nerdy, quiet, or uneventful- sometimes the most important things you do are when you’re at home, by yourself; making stuff, working, thinking, daydreaming, reading, coming up with/having ideas/thoughts, writing, etc.
2. if the most exciting sensation your vagina has had lately -is when you slowly pulled out a super long rogue hair that somehow ended up in there, there’s a problem! it’s time to meet a dude and have a sexy-time rendezvous.
3. buy a sturdy bed frame. FYI- you can’t find one at ikea! That’s for damn sure.
4. start setting ALL your friends up on blind dates!
5. this could be a cruel rumor- but I heard men have feelings too sometimes or whatever. It could be a vague lie, but i just thought I’d put it out there as a POSSIBILITY.
6. hey, remember water? Me neither! but I heard we should totally start drinking like a LOT of it!
7. stop thinking stuff about other people and not telling them. Don’t be a two faced person who avoids confrontation. When done correctly- confrontation can be a GREAT thing. It clears the air. So, cut it out and stop being such a pussy.
8. don’t forget: Never let people have power over you. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t treat people with respect- especially if they’re a boss or something- but never let someone hurt you deep down in your core. Don’t let anyone make you feel less than or as if the air they breathe is more valuable than the air you breathe. the truth is: we all just come out of someones vagina. Unless it’s a c section, or a stork delivery or whatever, but you get what I’m saying. We’re all coming from the same place. Except for the stork baby- cuz they ARE on a whole other level!
9. for the dudes: stop trying to stick your dick in a girls vadge without wearing a condom! she could have a disease! it’s 2009! this is real! we have to be careful! but every dude plays that game of ‘how far can i go? what will she let me get away with?but you should wear a condom for your own well being! for serious!
10. don’t buy cereal! you know you can’t NOT eat the whole box in one sitting! Why test yourself? you’ll lose every time!
PS: tomorrow night I’m hosting a party with the dim mak family in hollywood calornia! 6365 hollywood blvd. la ca 90028. 10pm – 2am! free vodka from 10-11pm! 21+ and $5 at the door! I’ll be interviewing party goers (maybe even you) while my interns are giving out free imboycrazy buttons and stickers! yayzers! it’s a record release party for fischerspooner! so, please come and let’s have a super awesome dance party! woo hoo! photos by the cobrasnake too even! wheee! dj sets by fischerspooner, them jeans, and dan oh! can’t wait to see you and hug! xo
5. this could be a cruel rumor- but I heard men have feelings too sometimes or whatever. It could be a vague lie, but i just thought I’d put it out there as a POSSIBILITY.
Just laughed for about 20 minutes. Awesome.
I also completely don’t understand #9. SERIOUSLY what the fuck is wrong with guys? I don’t understand how they would stick their prized possession in some random girly-hole without wrapping up.
i always look forward to “the blind leading the blind.”
you’re like the big sister i never had!
much love!
xo.
I just love the links to your videos in #1…making stuff and writing; yeah right…
Anyways, the blind leading the bling are great…and so are your videos!
Come on gimme more!
omg number 5! I always get stuck with those rare specimen with feelings. why?!?
i always look forward to “the blind leading the blind.” [2]
To add to #9:
The pulling out method is not effective birth control! You can get someone pregnant with pre-cum!
Haha….I just remembered #6 myself last night so today has been the day of water detox…..and even though #10 is true, I still by cereal like it’s going out of style anyway.
I love these blind leading the blind posts. ;D
I can only presume that #1 should only be followed when it’s not one of YOUR parties
http://www.firednfabulous.blogspot.com/
#1 is very good advice. I stay home a lot and occasionally hit up some parties because you’re right, the best things we do are in our alone time, and most important. Writing!!!
#6 — you’re so witty. I love you.
#10 — what???
And you’re party is something i’ll go to. See ya!
i love this one, the picture of kate and the artwork of you are supercute.
4 – hmm…could be deadly, could be the blind leading the blind and make yr friends think you want the same favor returned, i.e. getting set up on a blind date, which…because no. 5 renders his-place an impossiblity b/c if yr gfs set you up with him, chances are they set you up with the man that thinks an ikea-ized place is an idealized space for gettin the deed done and done and done and done and god forbid yr place is The Place which can result in opting for sex in public which can be interesting but be sure to get a lot of no 6 after you let out a lot of no 7 about how that really sucked
uh you should do a blind leading the blind on sex moves so we can talk in secret lingo e.g. 1 777 6 5 555 6 4 et cetera (yeah, like that friends episode i should be getting shot for mentioning)
party all ages or 21+? boooo
Hey Alexi,
We found your site through a friend.
Hanson with Sherwood
House of Blues Anaheim
Anaheim, CA
Wed, Nov 11, 2009 07:00 PM
Hope to see you there!
why don’t i live in l.a. NOW instead of next year?
i hope you’re still hosting awesome dance parties by the time i move. i want to take photos of you & blog about your hotness.
hilarious, i was eating cereal as i read this.
I agree with point 3 more so than anything you’ve ever written – I used to have a metal framed bed that would make more noise than was humanly possible to bare, but then I bought myself a lovely, sturdy leather bed.
The difference?
Un-fucking-believable.
love reading your blog
The blind leading the blind always makes my day. now I just have to get my ass out to cali so I can attend!
Oh my goodness. Number 10 crossed my mind at the supermarket after work tonight. I wanted Cheerios but knew I would end up eating the whole lot and feeling gross so I bought some bland, unpleasant ‘puffed wheat’ instead.
I just want to say ew to number 9.
#2- talk about candid! haha
7 is the one I need to remember the most. The thing is that I don’t gossip or anything like that. I’m worried about a friend that seems to be hiding inside her relationship. She lives with her boyfriend and after they get back from class, they don’t get out. They watch tv all day. We basically had to drag her out of her apartment when we were gonna have a karaoke night at my friend’s place (no alcohol). We’re think she might be depressed, but it’s always so difficult to bring it up (especially since we hardly see her anymore). Anyway, confrontation is a bitch, but i’ll just have to deal it.
I can’t wait to get on #4! xo
Boys? Feelings? ..I..don’t…understand. Definitely a vague lie.
Oh my god, Hanson commented. Haha…11 year old me would flip.
Girls def play the number 9 game too . It’s a fact .
You’re just crazy, who are you to be giving people advice? Why are you at the hundreds store? Sucking dick for hits. You’re attentioncrazy.com Go back to acting in gay commercials
This is a funny one. Right here right now funny. Please steal more pictures from Vanity Fair, Vogue, and Rolling Stone. The artsy ones not taken by Annie Liebovitz are good.
Agree with all…ESP the don’t buy cereal! Ha thought I was the only one! X
I agree with all the facts girl !!!
Ohhhh and that drawing of you towards the end of the post,did you draw that ?? Its beautiful,I think you should make a tshirt out of it ! I would totally get one <3 <3
big hugssssss
i think this is the best blog ever fucking written. ALEXI WASSER is my new idol ♥
I love these posts, I love you, and I love #1, which made me sad, and #2 which made my pepsi come out my nose. Thanks Alexi, my nostrils burn.
xoxoxoxoxoxox
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