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Agreed. Hope the dudes out there actually bother reading this, they could learn a few things.
Wow, what stirring words! Feels like “Any Given Sunday”.
NICE. Gwan with your bad self.
I actually think the sexes aren’t as different as everyone makes out, some things we will never understand, but dudes aren’t so complex, they have the same desires, they are not assholes, they are lovely
Chicks get a list of 9 things to do for 2010, and dudes get a freaking epistle? I have 3 words for the man you are seeking…”Paging Dr. Faggot”. Enjoy your bachelor party in the wine country. I am just playing. He is out there, He is married to my wife (I hope). I love your blog Lex you are awesome.
what if you haven’t got a personality?!
Alexi
This is why I love you so much. You have such an amazing view, and its especially great that it is coming from a female perspective. What I also love is that much like my blog, you don’t claim to have all the answers but like everyone else you’re learning. And its taken me a lot of time and heartache to learn a lot of these things myself.
My favorite part is the one about being direct and honest as the best game. It reminds me of one of my favorite Office clips..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFTEdyl1Vio
Approximately one billion kudos.
Cheers Alexi!
RE- hannah. good looks will blind the lack of a personality thing for a sec…. but, um, i’d be worried.
Bravo, Alexi…bravo.
Thanks for making US understand girls Alexi, love you.
i remember manning up, and took the amazing girl i have now down.
ahahahaah alexi im a girl and i just read the whole thing it rocks!! best part: BTW, personalities are cool too. get one this year! 2010 is all about possibilities! you can do it! make the transition; from a chump to a champ!
hahahaha totally!!! love it you really deserve lots of feedback!xxx
Dont play games, Truer words never spoken
you did a service, i had to figure out all this stuff on my own years ago.
Some guy just got a lot of knowledge dropped on him
This was absolutely brilliant! If all the dudes out there read this and took heed I would be in man-paradise!
I thought this read like a young girl rambling on about how boys/men should act. Oh wait…it IS. Long winded, redundant, and slightly boring. Not all guys are the same, nor does every girl want the man you described. Things dont have to be so complicated. Its easy….
BE GENUINE. BE YOURSELF. LOVE YOURSELF. AND EVENTUALLY, THE RIGHT SOMEONE WILL COME ALONG AND LOVE YOU FOR EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE.
a guy can try his hardest to be the suave-cat, career man that you described, but eventually his true colors will show….
..find your own way…and when you do…thats when you know you’ve come into your own…and you will get exactly what you deserve. Nothing worth having comes easy…
This was awesome to read, though I think it goes both ways gender wise. It gets super old listening to my slovenly, direction-less, friends of my boyfriend bitch about women. I want to tell them to look in the mirror, get some goals, and maybe try to actually do something worthwhile. Instead they smoke weed and drink cheap beer every waking moment they aren’t washing dishes for a living.
I agree with all of this except for the money part. Not all women look for a guy who makes a lot of money, that’s not really what success is measured by imo. As long as he’s doing what he loves and is happy and still has the other qualities you listed, that’s all that should matter. Also someone should send this to my ex, especially the part about living in a shit hole and having a huge ego.
STRONG MOVES. The End.
[...] here goes, #1: here is the post that inspired this post about posts. It’s just too good to let it go by without some mad [...]
The saddest thing about this post is that the avg guy won’t realize how brilliant this is/you are.
What’s more tragically sad (albeit hilarious) is that he won’t realize how much MORE action he’d get if he did heed this brilliant-ness!
You so smart.
angel
Love shyness is a phrase created by psychologist Brian G. Gilmartin to describe a specific type of severe chronic shyness. According to his definition, published in Shyness & Love: Causes, Consequences, and Treatments (1987), love-shy people find it difficult if not impossible to be assertive in informal situations involving potential romantic or sexual partners. For example, a heterosexual love-shy male will have trouble initiating conversations with women because of strong feelings of anxiety.
That sounds like a lot of work! What if I just buy some cologne?
as soon as you write the girl’s side of it you can put them together and call it the “imboycrazy 2010 Dating Manifesto”
OMG, i completely agree!! all guys should read this!
companion piece
http://www.valetmag.com/the-handbook/features/2010/31-days/day1-pant-break.php?31days_bottom_grid
31 tips to becoming a grown and occasionally sexy gentleman
Good thing i got my shit on lock
If only saying it were enough, here’s to hoping they listen.
x
okay this is what i posted as a comments on a friends facebook link, she was saying how people should read this, so i did. and this is what my heart and soul compelled me to write. take what you want from it but im not going to listen to this chick.
Sounds like you’ve just adapted her attitude to me; insulting people and saying our lives are sad. What she’s talking about doesn’t even apply to every-single person. and to be fair, what she’s talking about and what she’s entitled the blog or whatever it is, really doesn’t fit, she’s talking about how people should be better at things and this is how to do it, (probably due to past experiences..) but yet the real meaning of her used title is “Uninformed and incompetent people leading others who are similarly incapable.”
So what she’s implying with that is, that she is incapable, and trying to lead others who are just as uninformed.
There are lots of things wrong with what she’s saying and her motives for doing so, i think what ever way a guy grows up and his history makes him different and unique, which is what i’d prefer. and what i think most girls would find more interesting as well, if every guy a girl dated acted like this girl describes then wheres the fun in that? whats the point? it will be just like dating the same personality over again with a different face. finding your own heart is a much more understandable, and i’d say fun way than following what some girl says..
and girls reading this will just raise their bar of expectations of what a man should have. People who force their own views onto others kinda annoy me so for all you girls out there who believe this, and follow this, and the guys out there who actually read this and are trying to do what this girl says, stop being fake. stop being someone you aren’t. follow your heart and soul to a happier life.
Would be great if this was something all men had to read at some point in their lives.
@29. Ruby.
HA sorry no it wouldn’t. then all men would be exactly the same, think about it, would you really really want that? no didn’t think so. stop being a sheep and follow your own heart.
You are making far too many generalisations here. I understand a lot of guys can be dicks but its unfair to put everybody in one category and people reading this wont be any better off for doing so. People have to learn from their own mistakes and in their own way and thats the best way to do it. I think that your opinion of guys is actually quite sad at times and perhaps there is a lot of growing up to be done on your part but as I said we learn from our mistakes and some of the things you are saying, well you’ll learn from them.
Have you heard of capital letters, grammar, and punctuation? I guess you were blind whist typing this sanctimonious drivel. Sounds like you want an arrogant son of a bitch.
Okay so please explain why this post is so utterly offensive? In no way is Alexi asking guys to conform. Are you that incompetent? Its advice that would benefit the majority of the male population this day and age.
What she said makes a whole lot of sense.
IF YOU’RE A FRIGGIN’ MORON!!!
All you need to know is:
If it’s brown get down.
If it’s yellow, it’s mellow.
That works for just about everything.
31. Kyle, you said it
Anddd 33. Rose, advice? I doubt it, this is the farthest thing from advice I’ve ever seen, so what guys can be dicks, but not all of us. Alexi or whatever her fucking name is, is generalising people way too much, not all guys are the dicks she speaks of, and not all guys want to be the man she speaks of, and also! Not every fucking woman wants a man that she speaks of either! And you saying I’m incompetent or any guy who objects this just goes to show how much you fear to follow your own heart and soul when the slightest bit of oposittion comes up, so you Dive behind the safe wall you’re used to, also known as taking the popular side of things! I’m not incompetent at all, and many people would agree that I’m not, you’re exactly what the title of this explains. Uniformed and incompetent people(alexi) leading similarly incapable people( you rose). And girls girls girls, if you ever, ever want a man to do what you ask, or actually pay heed to any advice you give… Don’t fucking insult us, don’t tell us exactly how we should be, and don’t be an arrogant bitch like this girl here. Leave our lives up to us, let us live the way we want to. And if we all did exactly what this blog tells us to do we would all be the same. The way we live our lives and our past makes us who we are, and that our differences from other guys, our uniqueness and personal style is what makes a certain girls dream man!! So you let us be us, and you just worry about your period.
And I’d also like to mention, that the peter(me) who wrote comment 28, 30 35 Is very fucking different from the peter that left comment 6. He’s clearly a suck up.
Stop bitching about people drinking just because you had a bad experience/it’s not right for you doesn’t mean it’s not totally normal for other people to drink you’re biased and in the minority!!!
Why are people so offended by this post?
Relax, take it with a grain of salt
These are just alexi’s thoughts on the subject
So SHUTUP
Thanks
“even if you don’t (this is annoying though- cuz an attitude like that is confusing to girls when they eventually do get your pants off and it’s a tiny nubbin. but that’s not your fault, you were born like that.”
^^^^^^^
That made me laugh out loud! Haha. I loved this, it’s so true, now before I go to sleep, I hope I meet a guy that will read/has read this and will use it to his advantage!
Love you!!! XO ♥
This girl in the background of this picture looks just like you…
JUST sayin’.
http://img.ffffound.com/static-data/assets/6/4d775aad520e6ff64a818dbe4c9abe98f54d36ca_m.jpg
Sorry Peter, but you lose here.
You sound like you smoke too much pot and watch too much cable — “The way we live our lives and our past makes us who we are, and that our differences from other guys, our uniqueness and personal style is what makes a certain girls dream man!”
I’m almost certain that a guy that thinks this way is the kind of dude that our poor lady friends will settle for, for fear there is no better. Alexi has listed off extremely general notions of how to better oneself, and if you can’t handle it then stop reading. I think that if we females can handle societal notions of how to better ourselves for our men, like less nagging, more cooking, more make-up, less body-fat, more sex, less PMS, not to mention the fact that we bear the next generation in our bodies, then maybe, just maybe, the lazy, egotistical, arrogant, self-involved, inconsiderate, and machismo undertones in the male populations could surface less, and be masked by a bit of romance and chivalry. Not too much to ask I think.
PS:
“follow your heart and soul to a happier life.” — ew! Your heart is a piece of meat inside your chest, I hate when people talk like this. It’s the god-damned 21st century.
i agree whole heartedly with the ideas behind this. if i were to put it in my own words, it would be in the two following statements.
1) be the man that your father is/was/should/could have been
2) life your life the way you want others around you to live theirs.
Sorry “Ro” but i’m afraid I don’t lose in this one, you see you fall under the same category as alexi does here, as you’ve got me all wrong. As you probably have with a lot of men. You’ve sterotyped me as the typical “dude” you americans speak of, whereas where I’m from, my upbringing really did make me who I am today. I was raised by 3 girls,(my mother and two sisters) my father left to another city for business and I barely seen him so I have a little more patience towards girls who have it for me. I don’t actually infact smoke pot. And my television is barely switched on, apart for the times that me and my absolute amazing girl of a girlfriend go to watch a film. So yet again you’re wrong. You made the same mistake as alexi. Your sterotype things too much. My past has shaped me to be someone that my girlfriend absolutely loves and adores. And I know that I just haven’t been “settled” for, like you speak of.
And yes Ro, that is exactly what it is. God. Damned.
If girls all start to begin to think like this, the 21st century will be god damned. And you know exactly what Im talking about when I speak of your heart. So don’t even begin to be like that. Your heart is that thing that hurts while you cry your eyes out after either being dumped by the perfect man in your life, when you thought it was going well, or the thing that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy when you finally fall in love with someone else again. You know, the thing that feels like someones taken a big chunk of when you get stood up by the guy you really like? Yeh I thought so. You know exactly what I was talking about. So continue on with your generalisations of men and your high expectations of the perfect man to fall in love with and continue to find yourself heartbroken and crying because he wasn’t exactly as you thought. Hmmm who’da thought us men could actually been different? So take what you want yet again from what i’ve said but whatever you say back, and whatever way you next find to generalise and insult me won’t really affect me like you’d hope it would. Cause I know that I’m good for my girlfriend. Better than most other guys out there. And I know she knows it too. So have fun living that life of yours “Ro” cause I know I’ll enjoy mine.
Peter wins hands down
This post has made me so angry, I’m going to go drink some whiskey and beat someone.
due to kyles comment, i rest my case.
wth Alexi- I just saw you on a York peppermint commercial. Currently in Englewood, Florida.
Peter, unfortunately comments on a blog won’t change the fact that currents are shifting, feminism is up and so the stock for guys like you is down. thanks in part to imboycrazy.com, alexi you are the awesomest xx
I agree with Laura. Sorry, Peter, women as a whole are starting to respect themselves more, therefore making their expectations of men higher. The type of guy Alexi described is the one MOST women in this day and age would go for. Sorry, but that’s the truth.
@The Captain: I salute you, sir.
i’m with with the real peter on this too. not #6 suck up peter.
If women really want the kind of man Alexi has describe then they are going to have to be patient. As a young budding male I’ve made plenty of mistakes that has led to some heart break mostly for me but I do not deny the heart ache and pain because that is when I truly grow and learn who I am. I do not want to be what women want, I want to be what I am and I want women to want me for that. And to reciprocate I want a woman who wants to be who they are and I want to want them for that. A lot of wants but it kind of make sense. Not every male fits into the lacy James Bond façade, me being one, though I do think I am pretty cool and am pretty much in love with me.
If it’s all just a game then there are going to be cheaters. And in a game where my own well-being is at risk I would rather not play it especially when I’m surrounded by cheaters. I am going to be apart of the game though but rather than playing it I will be that rock that all the little kids kick around in the street never breaking cool and hard. And when the game is over and all the kids have gone home there I will remain steady and strong.
I do agree with some of what Alexi has said but again women you are going to have to be patient. I am not what I am not. No man/woman can be the ultimate man/woman because we are all human and we are all flawed. I love woman’s flaws as much as I love their beauty.
“Im looking for the right girl to play my side cuz deep down I know it’s gonna be a hell of a ride as I journey through this so called life and don’t need no body acting trife I need a girl make that a wife”
Original Flavor
“Peter,” so maybe you don’t smoke pot, or watch TV – but you sound like you do, and I am from Canada.
Bottom line is, you talk to much and seem a little self involved, certainly arrogant, and ultimately negative and combative. This is what we as self-respecting females who expect a lot from our lives want. If you don’t like it — too fucking bad, we aren’t hurting anyone by having standards. So get off the bitch train and go live your fantastic little life — if you really are so fantastic and lead such a stupendous life.
I don’t stereotype anyone, I know what I know from experience.
That’s totally fine if you think you are so bullet-proof to insults, but why bother attacking Alexi or the rest of us.
And here’s a Buddhist truth that you should take to “heart.” Everything comes to an end, everything changes. And when your “heart” hurts, it ain’t nothin’ but a chemical imbalance and overactive hormones. Mind over matter.
Oh and Phillip and Austin win, they get it.
As Jack Nicholson said in As Good As It Gets,
–”You make me want to be a better man.”
I want a dude who makes me shout that from the rooftops, that’s love.
[...] girl, I feel you,” like Alexi Wasser’s “The bling leading the blind” posts. The 2010 edition had me hmmm ing like a monk! These posts remind me kindly that it’s a jungle out there, but [...]
I agree with some of it. I am in college though getting a very high paid job is hard but I am in the process of getting a job. First, I have not met any guys who text an hour later or play stupid games. I think you know what you are talking about but you are wrong in that department. I give you kudos though cause most of it was right now. Just so you know, I have exactly what you are talking about. The girl is amazing and I do everything you have said. This is good advice for anyone who does not have this. It works. I just learned it on my own
I agree with Phillip though. I learned everything I know through heartbreak and past relationships.
People have flaws and my girlfriend has flaws and so do I but we are a strong couple but we get through it. I think thats what truly makes couples crumble because if you can get through the hard times you can get through anything.
I agree with Peter too. Fuck yeah. I barely watch tv and smoking pot became VERY limited to me because of my girlfriend because I have better things on my mind. Ro you are wrong sorry to say and we would be screwed if every girl thought that way so don’t because no one is perfect
i agree with everything she has said, but like others here, i feel it comes through experience and can’t really be pounded into anyone’s head. i would never expect this much respect or “knowledge” (for lack of a better word) regarding the opposite sex from, say, a 22-year-old guy…but i would most definitely be repulsed if someone twenty or even ten years older than he hadn’t learned those lessons. BUT, i also feel it goes both ways. there is absolutely no excuse or reason for a woman to be anything less than that which she expects from her man. i don’t subscribe to the rampant belief that women should be able to do whatevs they want without regard to the man’s feelings. men really DO have feelings, that much i have learned. xo
god I love this blog. You could not have made this any easier for a guy to understand unless you drew stick people pictures..then again the men I meet proably would have needed them u
Right on the money Alexi!!!
Another great way to give a reality check for those who need and some revitalization for those that are almost there.
and of course after all that we the brutes also have feelings
o my god your so right. ive dealt with too many stupid boys who only think with their cocks and never treat me with any respectt.
i dated this one guy who talked like he was king snake but he was just a little worm, if ya know what i mean.
lol some boys are quite blind then Lexy. i love this, i love your punctuations, question marks whatever. and your perspective is good.
Um, this is kind of the greatest blog post of all-time. I only wish this was in my life a few months ago. Siiiiigh. Live, learn and move on.
Thanks again. Message received!!
S*
The above posts that declare that the man who posted them is NOT a douche/ass/jerk positively reeks of inconsistencies. You’re not a jerk and yet you spent vast amounts of time hurling personal insult after insult at a woman who merely stated her opinion? Really? I hope you treat your girlfriend better than that.
As always, heterocentric, hegemonic, and terribly (if at all…) edited mumbo jumbo. And as always, the most entertaining and enjoyable of its kind.
Thanks Alexi <3
I fucking love you Alexi, thanks
“sometimes a girl is fucking you, and thinking about how she would never marry you because you bring nothing to the table. to her, you are a guilty pleasure behind closed doors. you may think you played her, and are getting under her skin… but the truth is.. you’re not good enough for her. and she’ll find out soon. when she meets a man that reveals what a boy you were. with all your bullshit, you blew it. and you thought you were being so cool. grow the fuck up dude. and get a job while you’re at it; you skinny, boring, couch surfer. we see you! BTW, personalities are cool too. get one this year! 2010 is all about possibilities! you can do it! make the transition; from a chump to a champ!”
this is my favorite part. spells out my life right now. had a toy & then was blown away by a man. boys – ya, sure, we won’t throw you out of bed, but, ugh – we won’t fall in love with you or anything. it’s all about the menz.
this is the biggest pile of shit ever.
You need to get over the whole guys paying for dinner thing. Maybe YOU should take the high road once in a while. Ever wonder if maybe he thinks you’re a bitch, because you’re never willing to step up the plate and show him you care about HIM? Do you think he has more money than you do because he’s a man? And you can’t just lay him and call it even either. How would you feel if if a dude was constantly making you pay for his meal and justifying it with the fact that you got to have sex with him. Wouldn’t be so cool now, would it?
Narcissism is contagious.
This is what I love/hate about the internet. Everyone has their opinions and views, but they fail to realize that no one is right and no one is wrong. Your individual experience as a human being can never be duplicated, that is the magic of being a self-contained piece of biology. No matter what, no one will ever see the world as you do. So, in effect, both Alexi and Peter and everyone else who read this blog/left a comment are correct, in THEIR OWN human experience.
I think The Captain gets it :]
i n s p i r e d
love you girlfriend.
Alexi is officially on crack.
These comments are hilarious.
Not everyone wants a rich hipster Alexi! But I get it. The moral of the story is JUST DO IT. Do like Nike. Oh, and don’t mess with crazy bitches. =)
Goddamn, that was good!!!
and all that still doesn’t matter.
this is a great blog, your a very talented writer and I think you should pursue it as a career. That was all sarcasm, and BTW thats me running in the middle, thanks for giving my friend photo cred, you piece of trash.
Haha. Funny. Pay for dinner? What entitles women to my money? I’ll buy a couple of drinks, then get laid. That’s what it takes. And by the way, the bigger asshole I am, the more I get laid. The only competition I have is with guys who are bigger assholes than me (there aren’t many, and even less the more guys who take your advice). You’re sweet, young and idealistic. Good luck with that. I’m going to go get laid now.
“Jason X”
Yeah. I’m sure you will be able to get laid after buying a woman a few drinks when you’re 40…Psych, asshole. Guess what? You have to grow up someday.
MS:
I love how women define being “grown up” as being in a committed relationship with one of them. A guy who opens doors for women, pays for everything, quits drinking and smoking because she told you to, does not make a man “grown up”. It makes him a pussy. Yes, there are plenty of “Nice” guys for you to enslave. They are not my competition. I will continue to get laid and be happily not committed.
(Go ahead, now make the small dick joke because that’s what women do when they have no argument)
Alexi should go into marketing, or advertising. The image of the perfect man she has conjured in her acrimonious rant is simply a product she is attempting to sell. To herself. She needs to get real. Also, she has made it glaringly apparent that there have been losers in her past. Doesn’t she know that I guy doesn’t have to be rich and suave to be desireable? Give me intelligence and authenticity over “game” or a house in the hills any day.
Hmm sensitive much? The post is just another witty attempt at getting guys like Jason X to understand that when they are old as fuck they will regret not putting in the effort thinking about stuff like -(http://imboycrazy.com/2010/01/reader-submission-something-to-think-about/)earlier. Sure, we all get that. You have issues and you don’t wanna get close to someone NOW and that’s fine. Who doesn’t enjoy banging their asses off indiscriminantly at one point or another (ok, maybe not everyone, but I will admit that I have if only to show that I am objective about this). I’m certain that Alexi doesn’t really care WHAT you (Jason and Peter for example)do, at the end of the day our lives are our own. She is the first to admit that she has ‘issues’ (and that contrary to what many of you seem to have misconstrued, she LOVES MEN). Ultimately, this is just Alexi channeling her delicious sense of humour and insight (AND RESILIENCE!!!) into a post that is not meant to be taken as any kind of serious life advice (unless you are open to it, in which case I say there are some good points here). Take what you want and leave the rest, if you’re gonna take it so serious. Or take none if you don’t like it. Leave the rest of us to LOL and nod at what is just more gold from the I’m Boy Crazy corner. I mean, the blog title says it all. It’s not the Dr Phil show.
*It’s a pep talk in the form of a slap in the face in the form of a blog.* Keep it comin Alexi xxx
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dear god, that was perfect.