All I’m looking for in a girlfriend is someone I can laugh with, who looks good on my arm and makes me cooler. We should be able to tell each-other anything without boundaries or judgement! No judgement! I’d love for you to teach me to wear red lipstick. And for me to feel comfortable enough [...]
i felt compelled to start the cycle again. the control of ruining myself a little, then healing, then hurting myself. like a cutter . I would look at myself naked when I’d heal and think, ’shit! Now I have nothing to complain about. i have nothing to keep me hidden in my apartment, or feeling [...]
i don’t know if you’ve noticed, but my stories and rants have been lacking lately. I’ve been seriously blocked. blocked by breakups, unresolved feelings, a death in the family, five of my most serious ex boyfriends calling me out of the blue all in the same week; one of which i lived with & was [...]
suddenly i was forced to feel stuff that i wouldn't have felt, Washington WA Wash. , had i not had sex to begin with. maybe if it had been with someone who wanted to date me, and was sticking around, Osta retin a online, that would have been something else. Acheter en ligne retin a, but i set myself up to feel lonely. if the dude liked me and was sticking around- i would have just felt more powerful and my ego wouldn't have been bruised cuz i would have been the one in charge of the ignoring/dismissal, order retin a no prescription. hmm. something to think about, retin a pills. after all, Missouri MO Mo. , i said i didn't want anything more than a hook up (to him and to myself) god damn it. I'm much too smart for this bullshit. i actually give other people really Order retin a no prescription, good advice.
bottom line: i had sex with the dick pic guy, retin a ordine on-line. there was no love connection here whatsoever. παραγγείλετε online retin a, so what the fuck was my problem. it was an epic night. and if i just looked at it for what it was, and left it at that, I'd be fine, order retin a no prescription. but I'm not as tough as i thought, retin a online cheap. sex with someone you don't like, Delaware DE Del. , someone you do like, and someone you love is all powerful. someone will always be affected, ordering retin a online. giving yourself away, Köpa rabatterade retin a, even when you think you're taking something you can handle in the moment, is not as easy as it seems... for me Order retin a no prescription, anyways.
if this experience can be used for anything, Texas TX Tex. , it will be to help me learn what i can and can't handle in my life right now. Generic retin a, i am too easily rattled. even if only for a few days... that's a few days too many, Connecticut CT Conn. . the majority of the time, sex affects me, order retin a no prescription. I'm sensitive. Koop korting retin a, i feel stuff. things linger in my brain, and i over-think, cheapest retin a prices. nothing with me is light or casual when i let someone into my vadge-hole people. Order retin a no prescription, so don't even try it. Ordering retin a, i may not be a sweetly sad faced, overweight, African American girl, comprar retin a baratos, but i too am precious. Køb billige retin a, all i know is this; I've had sex with cold dudes who are blatantly emotionally unavailable and sex with guys who are still emotionally unavailable- but really good at making a girl feel cozy. and right now, i too am just as emotionally unavailable, lowest price retin a. but, Cheap retin a no prescription, ultimately, both make me feel more lonely AFTER the encounter than i felt before. regardless, i took my sexxxy times medicine and I'm prob good for another four months, order retin a no prescription. but even AFTER that; no more casual sexxing for me, order retin a online cheap. especially with trollers and dick pickers. Retin a discount, yikes.
i have to be much more careful with myself. Order retin a no prescription, because even though my mind thinks I'm tough and it's all good, i end up weaker in the end. depleted of energy, Vermont VT Vt. . this also goes for me leading guys on, who i know i don't like, just so i can feel wanted. it's rude and thoughtless. sex is not casual. that being said: make-outs ARE, order retin a no prescription. I might be sensitive and more grown up now... but I'm not dead.
this fling represented something bigger for me. it made me think about how different experiences can be; what i want, definitely do not want, and behavior of mine that I'd like to change. Order retin a no prescription, behavior that, up until a few days ago, i didn't even realize i engaged in. in a perfect world, my future won't involve men ever sending me a picture of their dick again. and certainly not with me sleeping with them- like a reward or something. but the sex was fun, and i don't regret it. even the part when i found out he's a blogger too, and him writing about me.
he's not my future husband or anything, order retin a no prescription. JUST a random encounter. but totally blog-worthy and a tool to be used for self reflection and growth.
i just realized why I'm boy crazy; I'm boy crazy because every time i see/meet a new dude- i have hope. hope because it's another chance for me to find love. a love that's unconditiona Order retin a no prescription, l and stronger than the love i never got from my father. wahhhhhhhhh.
how was i the last person to know this about myself. thank god it's finally dawned on me. but i wonder how I'll change now that I've realized this. i guess I'll have to wait and see. xo.
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Buy retin a c.o.d., one thing led to another and before i knew it- we were rolling around naked, kissing... which yes, totally led to sex. but this was different, goedkope retin a apotheek. this wasn't like the flings I'd had months before. i was having a sexy time rendezvous/fling with a cuddly guy. his mouth said 'blah, blurg, sarcastic joke here, clumsy jab there!' but his body said 'love me, and i'll love you', buy retin a c.o.d.. Ordering retin a online legally, was this how he was with every girl. what was his MO. who knows. who cares, αγοράζουν φτηνά retin a. Buy retin a c.o.d., this was epic. we tickled eachother, held eachother, Kjøpe retin a, took breaks to spoon, he told me about his parents, we talked about dreams (listen, i have dream boards/to do lists of my goals ALL OVER MY APARTMENT, Køb discount retin a. sure they're facing the wall, so no one can read them- but if i didn't tell him, Purchase retin a, he would have just turned them around. i was at his mercy!)
i could see the little boy version of himself in his face. he didn't seem evil at all. even if he was a crass, dick pic'ing dude.
we looked deep into each others eyes, pretended to sleep with our mouths open and pressed together, like silly little kids, buy retin a c.o.d.. if there was ever a way to have a fling- this was the way to do it, comprar retin a. it was the best of both worlds: extreme emotional intimacy & tenderness MEETS casual cool & commitment free. two people sharing a moment and then moving on with their lives. Buy retin a cod, holy shit, he really DID look like a young Richard Gere. maybe he was the real life American gigolo- circa NOW Buy retin a c.o.d., . he was giving me the full experience, that's for DAMN sure!
after, as we lay in bed together, Montana MT Mont. , i had the realization: even though i'm having such a nice time, and this has been such a great affair, i (still) do not want to be in a relationship with anyone (right now/at this point in my life) and I'm so happy to be single.
the night before, online retin a, during our FIRST make-out, i had stopped kissing him and yelled: 'thank god for facebook. Discount retin a, this is exactly what i needed.' and now, post coital, i STILL felt that way. no regrets, retin a sale, no impulse to cry, i didn't feel more alone than ever. he put his arm around me, and i was fine, buy retin a c.o.d.. South Carolina SC S.C. , we stayed up till 5am, fell asleep for a sec, woke up at 6am, and i called him a cab so he could get his bags from his hotel and go to the airport, αγοράσετε retin a. he kissed me goodbye and left.
as the door closed behind him, Købe retin a online, thoughts like; 'shit, that was epic. Geeze, like, acheter retin a discount, um, wow, New York NY N.Y. , if he was gonna be in town for just a few days longer- i would have loved for us to show each other every sexual thing we've ever learned.' and 'we should just hole up in a Vegas hotel suite and have sex all weekend!' went through my dopamine riddled brain. Buy retin a c.o.d., later that day, i met up with my best male friend. we split a cupcake and traded sexual seduction stories. i was elated and exhausted. i saw my therapist the next day. i was still so happy, kopen goedkope retin a. she said i was on a dopamine high. i asked her when the crash would be, but she just shrugged, buy retin a c.o.d.. well, Cheap generic retin a, thanks for nothing. not to worry, i would soon find out on my own.
as the days went by i realized i was more sensitive than i thought, billiga retin a apotek.
WEDNESDAY- (day of dude's departure) i was elated, beaming, and exhausted. Buy retin a c.o.d., THURSDAY- i was satisfied and happy.
FRIDAY- i was bummed, borderline needy/obsessing. my eyes glued to my blackberry, and shocked that he wasn't feeling the same way. (dopamine crash. hollah!) at one point i even asked a whole foods employee in the wine section for help. he asked if i preferred red or white, but instead of a wine quesh, i asked him to decode the cryptic, nothing texts facebook guy had sent me, buy retin a c.o.d.. what. there's no shame in my game. oh wait, i wrote that wrong; there was a lot of shame in my game that week. i had no game. it was not Buy retin a c.o.d., sexy. the wine dude agreed.
SATURDAY- i was over it. (but still telling anyone who would listen about my fling and post fling FEELINGS. gross - insert punch to my face here. )
SUNDAY- 98% of me was back on track, happy, and busy with other stuff, buy retin a c.o.d.. phew. 1% of me (my ego) was hoping he was thinking about me. and the other 1% was disappointed in myself for caring. i was better than that. Buy retin a c.o.d., but this was deeper than logic, this was biology. this was what sex does/can do to a woman. shit.
i used to love drama and to feel stuff just for the sake of feeling. but this was too much. i was a mini emotional roller coaster. it was keeping me out of the present moment and unfocused. is this why boxers don't have sexxx before a fight.
(to be continued).
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while we sat over coffee Buy seroquel no prescription, - he started telling me about a girl he'd hit on recently, back home in NYC. was he serious. did he not find me attractive. Hawaii HI , was this turning into a bro out sesh, because i thought it was a date. not one to hold back, i said 'are you trying to sleep with me, købe seroquel. because, if you are, why are you talking about another girl?' he got flustered and smiled, said it was a while ago, trying to make it into a silly thing, brushing it under the rug, buy seroquel no prescription. that was a close one. i really wanted to like him. Idaho ID , or at least, for him not to blow it.
i bought candles at Larchmont beauty center, i drank tons of pineapple juice for WHATEVER reason, i wore eyeliner and tights, North Carolina NC N.C. . Buy seroquel no prescription, we didn't have dinner plans. no. i didn't want to eat in front of him, Cheap seroquel tablets, or gain weight from this experience. no. i wanted a cozy, sexy night, purchase seroquel. we made plans for him to come over at 8:45, buy seroquel no prescription. i liked the controlled atmosphere of my house. like i was inviting him into my lair. Buy seroquel, as if we were kids hiding in a fort, except the fort wasn't made out of two chairs and a blanket- it was a 1 bedroom with hardwood floors. my house was clean- I'd had it cleaned the Sunday a few days prior (for me, not him), kopen goedkope seroquel. Buy seroquel no prescription, he came over. i was trying to appear casual cool, on my computer, Seroquel discount, finishing up with some work. i didn't want to put my responsibilities on the back burner, and i thought it would be super cute to pose on my bed, in front of my computer and say 'this is what i look like when i facebook.' so i did, Alaska AK .
he told me to take my time, and wandered into my living room. Cheap seroquel overnight delivery, oh no you don't. i'd heard him say he likes to snoop around peoples houses, buy seroquel no prescription. what if he stole something. that last part was a joke.... kind of, kjøpe seroquel online. you never know. for years Buy seroquel no prescription, i had a fear that if i had a boy over at my house, he would pee on my toothbrush while he was in my bathroom. i had absolutely no proof of this whatsoever, District of Columbia DC D.C. , but I'd throw away my tooth brush after each fling/visit, just in case. sometimes you just have to follow a hunch/trust your instincts.
i finished my work and hurried after him into the next room, Pennsylvania PA Penn. , giving him the mini tour of my living room. i wondered if my descriptions of the photos that hung on my wall sounded rote, αγοράζουν online seroquel, or if he was even listening. i remembered him promising over the phone- months earlier- that if ever came over, he'd play my 'sex and the city' board game with me, buy seroquel no prescription. i wasn't gonna miss this chance. i never have anyone to play with.
it was cute, Maine ME Me. , and sweet. we talked, Pharmacy seroquel, joked while he set up the game. i liked that we didn't just immediately Buy seroquel no prescription, start making out. we were like two human beings, just hanging out, playing the 'sex and the city' board game. neither of us ended up being very good, well that's not true. i was a champ. maybe he was fibbing about having been a pro. I'll never know, buy seroquel no prescription. we played for like 8 minutes. i won. thank god.
he said 'come here'. i put my hand in his. he pulled me towards him and kissed me.
(to be continued).
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Ever since my first Buy cheap seroquel online, kiss, under the hidden stairs of a temple at one of my classmates bar mitzvahs, with a mouth full of braces and a crazy tongue circling technique- i learned something. something that hasn't changed from then to know:
Boys will ALWAYS see how far they can take can go; how far they can take it, when it comes to sexy times, kjøpe seroquel.
it's as though ALL thoughts/fear/acknowledgement of getting AIDS, Washington WA Wash. , herpes, warts, chlamydia, Tennessee TN Tenn. , whatevs, Order seroquel no rx, goes out the window when their dick is involved. if they kiss you, they wanna suck on your boobs, seroquel no prescription. if they get that, Rabatt kaufen seroquel, they wanna put their hands in your undies. if they finger you, they want to lick you, buy cheap seroquel online. if you give them get a blow job, they want to cum in your mouth/on your face/in your eyeball; and for you to swallow like a champ, Georgia GA Ga. . and if they know you're gonna sexxx them, Seroquel online cheap, they want to fuck you WITHOUT a condom. they NEVER want to wear a condom. 'it's too tight', cheap seroquel online, 'it's too big', Ordering seroquel overnight delivery, 'i can't feel anything', 'it's so annoying', 'i hate these fucking things', buy cheap seroquel online, 'i'm clean i swear.' wahhhhh.
it's like going into battle;
it's like wheeling and dealing at some flea market in Abu Dhabi (reference made in honor of sex and the city 2: Buy cheap seroquel online, coming soon, to a theatre near you muthah-fuckahz/ladies/my gay brothers!)
it's like playing Russian roulette with an aids baby instead of a bullet. Ordering seroquel pills, it's like sitting down without a lawyer in court, with a possible life sentence of.... like death, billige seroquel apotek.
you just have to make your case, Köpa seroquel, make it good, and stand by it. so you don't get a life sentence, seroquel en ligne afin. all the while keeping your voice sexy and the mood light, buy cheap seroquel online.
Nowadays you have to protect yourself while trying to get close to someone. Nebraska NE Nebr. , it fucking sucks. It's easy to start resenting a guy right away when sex is involved. what you let happen sexually is something you end up panicking over/worrying about- the next day, comprar seroquel de descuento, or even moments after. Buy cheap seroquel online, instead of 'wow. Order seroquel online, we just connected in such a literal, beautiful, biblical way, seroquel prescription. yayzers!' you think 'i hope the condom didn't break. Ordering seroquel online without prescription, he better not have lied about not having herpes. shit, he probably just doesn't even know cuz he's too lazy to get tested, South Carolina SC S.C. . if he was such a pro about getting in MY vadge without a condom, he must have experience talking OTHERS into being fucked sans condom!"
instead of thinking 'i wonder if he'll call me.' you're waiting for his TEXT three days later while sitting in the waiting room at your gyno's office praying to god you're not preggers, positive for syphilis, warts, etc, buy cheap seroquel online.
All this worry even if he DID wear a condom AND pulled out before he came. Seroquel farmacia a buon mercato, you just NEVER know. THAT'S how scary it is nowadays. Sex is a liability, billige seroquel Apotheke, not a luxury. Buy cheap seroquel online, and abortions aren't another form of birth control. Buy seroquel without prescription, they're scary too. avoid those at all costs, if you can, seroquel over the counter.
But as scary as fucking, and licking, and sexing, and sucking is in 2010- love, sex, and hormones are STILL too powerful to say no to. now, then, and FOREVER. So i guess all we can do is just know what we're getting ourselves into, not feel pressured or bullied, use condoms, birth control pills, spermicide, diaphragms, take preventative valtrex, get tested after every time we sexxx someone/blow someone/get eaten out by someone, and basically try our hardest not to end up soaked in a bucket load of aids infected cum.
good luck.
i love you.
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anyways, Ordering chantix online cheap, the waiter was a super hot babe- just to be clear. Dark hair, dreamy, Hawaii HI , and NOT french. Kjøp Discount chantix, perfect. Buy cheap chantix online, he looked like a broke, dirtier, even more angsty, but with a bigger d*ck version of Robert Pattinson. and that's saying a lot for me. cuz i already imagine Robert Pattinson has a HUGE private, αγοράσετε chantix έκπτωση. if anyone knows him, Order chantix no prescription, send him my way. that could be an epic night. hotel, glass of wine, and a tawdry/torrid/sexy make-out etc, buy cheap chantix online.
anyways, Michigan MI Mich. , back to my story: Now, Order chantix from canada, keep in mind, the Lisa loeb reality show took place in NYC and I live in la. um, Vermont VT Vt. , I'm not saying I went to ny JUST for the chocolate shop dude-but when I did end up in NY, Buy chantix without prescription, I sure as hell made it a point to find that shop. endless googling of the words 'Lisa loeb, chocolate, buy chantix online cheap, cafe' ensued. Order chantix online, well, I found it. Buy cheap chantix online, like a mother fucking champ. the show did not make it easy, ordering chantix from canada, that's for DAMN sure. Cheap chantix pills, no 'thank you's' to 'insert french cafe name here' in the credits. what was that all about?. thanks for nothing assholes, chantix kopen. even though the song 'stay' will forever be a solid and reliable karaoke jam for me and a million others, buy cheap chantix online.
when I cozied up at a table in the cafe, Billig chantix apotek, all by myself, (while my boyfriend at the time was at sound check) ordered a hot chocolate and waited, it all seemed worth the effort. i didn't see him, kjøpe chantix online. hmm, Comprar chantix de descuento, no worries. I'm sure he was just making a tea, or organizing a plate of scones in the back or whatevs, Køb billige chantix. i asked the ugly, Chantix ordine on-line, boring waiters- who WERE there- if they knew who i was looking for. i sputtered out some retarded description; hoping that if he wasn't Buy cheap chantix online, there, it was ONLY because he was in Los Angeles looking for me. i held my breath for their answer.
and you know what, Osta chantix online. the dude wasn't fucking there anymore! nope, he'd quit a few weeks prior. GOD DAMMIT. maybe i wasn't the first visitor who'd come looking for him, buy cheap chantix online. well, i'd like to think i was the cutest. at least one thing was on my side... they told me he was straight. so at least if i did find him, he couldn't use his sexuality as an excuse not to kiss me. Buy cheap chantix online, well, I tried. Had I REALLY wanted to find him, I could have asked the waiters and manager that WERE there for his phone number. But, I wasn't CRAZY. and i wasn't looking to cheat. I guess I just wanted a mission and to see if he was as cute in person as he was on my TV screen.
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Buy estrace online cheap, I'd just gotten home after one of those nights where i did ONE thing that left me feeling like someone thought i was stupid, weird and/or dumb. I'd said something to some dude i thought was a dork, and wasn't even attracted to, and now i couldn't shake it. why did i even care what he thought of me. he played no part in my life, cheap estrace no prescription. he had a girlfriend. i had a boyfriend, buy estrace online cheap. but now my whole world was caving in. the spiral had begun; regretting how i acted, what i said, Cheap estrace online, wondering what he was thinking about me now, and how i could change his OBVIOUSLY ill opinion of me. he probably wasn't even giving me a second thought. but let's face it, he probably was. but hopefully Buy estrace online cheap, not. whatever, Indiana IN Ind. , he can shit talk/think I'm awkward and lame- all he wants. it just weeds out the people who aren't meant to be in my life. yeah. sometimes i wish i didn't internalize and analyze everything so much. sometimes I'm very happy i do, buy estrace online cheap. Köpa billiga estrace, either way, i do. I've learned that the best way to get over my crazy spirals is to pretend it's a week later- speeding up the inevitable, when i know I'll have forgotten i ever even cared what some dude/person/people may or may not have been thinking of me.
that aside, i was using this stranger to distract myself from what was REALLY going on in my life: I'd done it again, estrace online. I'd cast a spell on a boy and gotten caught up in the moment and not realized that my actions have consequences. Buy estrace online cheap, that men have feelings too. and that my behavior, words, touch, Estrace without a prescription, gaze, and attention can have/has an affect on people. i was in too deep with a guy, and i wasn't feeling 'it' anymore. at least not like i was. now i was left in a sticky situation, Rhode Island RI R.I. , but i wasn't ready to pull the plug, cuz i didn't know exactly how i felt. it had gone from epic, to me freaking out, to casual, buy estrace online cheap. and it felt like the bubble burst and i should call it a day. but things aren't black and white. Kjøpe billig estrace, i didn't know what i wanted. i'd met a really great guy. Buy estrace online cheap, there was nothing wrong with him, i just wasn't sure if he was right for me. was my confusion enough of a sign to end it, or should i take some time to casually date him and get to know him before i ran . the only thing was, this thing didn't start out casual, köpa rabatterade estrace, it started out full throttle and my doubts were only setting in after 'i love you's' were said and he'd asked to go steady or whatever you call being boyfriend and girlfriend. how did i get here. i wouldn't go back in time and change a thing... i just didn't know how to go forward, buy estrace online cheap.
so often i worry and act out when i don't get the attention i want from every guy who comes my way. Iowa IA , i don't take the time to consider if i even like THEM. unless they're a TOTAL dorky/ugly/pussy... THEN i don't give a fuck! but I'd still have sexxx with a bizarre looking/interesting/successful dude. Buy estrace online cheap, in a heartbeat. my friend Dallas thinks i have the worst taste in men cuz I've slept with fat, ugly, short, estrace sale, abnormally tall, sickly skinny, balding, and bald dudes. Halvalla estrace apteekki, not all at the same time. don't worry. I've only had one threesome, and it was with a girl and a guy who were both hipster/heroine chic. but that's another story, for another time, buy estrace online cheap.
anyways, it takes all kinds, Arkansas AR Ark. . the point is, if i even have one- cuz i might not, is that i get caught up real quick. I'm in love with love. Billige estrace apotek, or at least infatuation. Buy estrace online cheap, i can be a dreamy, whimsical person who can find a million different meanings in one look a boy gives me. (which can be unfortunate for the dude sometimes!) i have no problem and am happy to make extreme eye contact during sex. the deeper and more meaningful the experience can be, the better. the only problem is, as easily as i can throw myself all in, estrace en ligne afin, i can just as easily shut down- leaving a guy in the lurches. but isn't that just called life. it's not pretty and safe and wrapped up in a bow all the time, buy estrace online cheap. and don't men act irresponsibly with women's feelings all the time. I'd rather go full throttle, παραγγείλετε online estrace, then press on the brakes if i decide to- instead of treading safely and being careful from the get go.
but what was i even looking for. i wasn't old enough or ready to get married, or craving a boyfriend. Buy estrace online cheap, I've never sought out having a boyfriend anyways. it always just 'happens'. but i wanted the love, estrace without prescription. and for a minute, i felt it too. in fact; i was in and out of it. but then the seriousness of the situation set in: "boyfriend" "i love you's", buy estrace online cheap. i panicked and had to decide if i should break it off completely, Kaufen estrace, or pull the pussy move by picking fights and being passive aggressive to make him break up with me. i had one foot in and one foot out. a part of me would think "god, the sex is great. he's good-looking, but he's not my normal type, buy cheap estrace. but maybe that's a good Buy estrace online cheap, thing!?" even though, according to Dallas, i don't even have a type. I'd vacillate between thinking we were too different and thinking we're actually very similar. sometimes, I'd imagine myself in his arms, spooning and think "you know what, Online estrace, i could call it a day and call him the one for good!" i hope all girls can be this nutty, because i do NOT like feeling this way. and there's SAFETY in numbers bitches.
did all this uncertainty mean he was the wrong guy for me. could he have been the right guy, but i was just too young and immature and preoccupied with the need to be alone and work, buy estrace online cheap. would i be the one missing out in the end. could i even trust my gut anymore, order estrace online cheap, after all, i have a million 'daddy' issues. i didn't know what to do. should i just stay away from guys, αγοράσετε estrace, to save them from me and my behavior. Buy estrace online cheap, wow, how self important am i. is it better to stay with someone if they're a good person, attractive, and the sex is great - even if the initial crazy euphoria has died down so soon and you could also just as easily be alone. but what if the person is great and could make a lovely boyfriend you could learn from. does it always have to be under the condition of 'forever'?
if the fireworks/mad crazy aspect of the relationship has died down and you know you've met too early on in your life and there's no way they will be your final destination (which, estrace over the counter, to me, is a baby daddy). and yes, i know the 'final destination' isn't always the man who fathers your child. but he will, most likely, be in your life forever- whether you split or not, cuz of the kid, buy estrace online cheap. Estrace pharmacy, so you better be as damn sure about him as you can be if/when you let him cum inside you without a condom.
if all that you're left with is a nice guy you have sexual chemistry with, do you run and hold out for another "forever" prospect. or do you just hang out with someone and have a nice, fun time?
the thing is, I've been single and had sex with guys who don't love me and it doesn't feel good, cheap estrace. but to be with someone who loves you when you're in 'single, all about me and my own personal responsibilities' mode- feels shitty too. Buy estrace online cheap, so what is the answer. I'm not wishy washy. I'm all in or nothing. so this makes loving and relationships more confusing. and usually when a girl is aloof with a guy and doesn't give a fuck and it's casual for HER/on her terms.. the dude falls in love, buy estrace online cheap.
but being grounded and loved by someone you like can be nice too.
i guess when it's in sync, and the love is equal on both ends and sustains itself- you know you've found something bigger than logic, timing, rules, and being rational. you just make room for it in your life, cut the bullshit, stop analyzing, shut the fuck up- because you're happy to do so and it feels super good and right. and even if you're not gonna be with someone forever, isn't it better to live under the spell that it 'might' last forever and be open to the possibility of that chance.... and end it if/when Buy estrace online cheap, that dream is shattered, than stay with someone who you know in your bones you won't be with when you're old and gray. cuz then both parties are being kept from something else that could be epic.
it's better to take the chance of losing someone, and being alone, then stay because it's safe and they're good for now/a warm body. that's way more scary than being alone.
but, just like power shifts in a healthy relationship, do 'love surges' come and go as well. don't moods shift as well. i wouldn't wanna make any extreme decisions while I'm pms'ing... cuz I'm a completely different person.
all these thoughts, but i still didn't know what to do....
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THE MONSTER ASKS ABOUT LOVE: from alexi wasser on Vimeo.
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