losing your virginity:

so, I've been getting A LOT of e-mails asking for advice on how to lose your virginity. e-mails from girls who are between the ages of 19 and 26 who are still virgins, asking me for advice. i didn't really know how i could help or what i could say. so i gave it some thought and here's what i came up with:

wanna lose your virginity? It's super easy! just spread your legs and place the dude's erect penis into your hopefully wet privates aka vagina. Super easy! Virginity GONE! What more do you need to know? 

Oh, sorry. you mean; how do you go about picking the right person? Getting tested? Approaching a guy in the first place? Trusting him? Trusting yourself? Being brave and jumping off the cliff into sexdom? 'sexdom'? Sometimes I write shit and I say to myself "who are you? Why did you write that? you're totally misrepresenting yourself." But then I shrug and keep writing. My style is more stream of consciousness. I just have to keep going or else I'll panic, over think and stop writing all together. Feel free to use this as an analogy regarding your sex life and losing your virginity. 

What else is it called? Popping your cherry? Gross. Anywayzies. It's a big deal cuz you'll ALWAYS remember the first person you ever let inside you, but you probably won't be marrying this person. They are a stop on your life's path! A memory. A hurdle to jump over. a tool used for growing up. Just make sure he doesn't have herpes, gonorrhea, warts, chlamydia, hpv, and isn't HIV +. cuz that shiz will haunt you forevs.

Listen, it's pretty cool you've waited this long. (i'm talking more to the 19 year old. 26 is bordering on tragic heap.) It means you're nervous, thinking about it, and take yourself seriously. So since you've waited this long, you shouldn't be worried about waiting a teeny bit longer for you and the dude to get tested. Don't pick up some random guy off the street or some mall dude over the weekend. (any other time, that would be cool- but not to take your virgin status!) If you're in high school or college, there are tons of dudes. All aching to get in some girls vadge! Duh! Don't forget, YOU have the power! your vadge is- to a guys dick- like the entry way into some exclusive Hollywood club! 

Maybe you should lose it to a close heterosexual male friend you have that you never really looked at that way. Like dawson's creek styles! It would be COOLER if he's more experienced than you too! Then you could ask him questions about giving blow jobs and stuff. giving a great blow job is a beautiful and powerful thing. haters, you can hate, but it's the truth. 

let him go down on you too! don't let him stop until you cum. Take a bath first so you're all scrubbed up and clean- so there's no room for embarrassment or self consciousness! and I'm praying to GOD you've been masturbating long enough to even KNOW what an orgasm feels like! It's like a warm tickley explosion in your nether regions! Make it a familiar feeling! 

How's that? I can't hold your hand through this, but I can leave u with this: Have sex (whether it's the first time or the millionth time) with someone you trust, who makes you feel safe. and ALWAYS use a condom. AND even though he's wearing a condom, make sure he pulls out before he cums! Cuz condom's break and if something goes wrong- unfortunately it's on the girl to take the morning after pill, get an abortion or HAVE the baby! So, take care of yourselves beautiful girls! Xoxoxo