Monday, May 4, 2009

firemen- a precurser to an intro to an expose:

so, the other day i was on the phone with my friend jesse. i had just walked out of the american apparel on ventura blvd and had A LOT of hot goss to spew. mid conversation, i walked past a parked fire truck. HMMMM, where there's a fire truck, firemen are SURE to follow! there was no sign of a blazing inferno and a few steps further down the boulevard i hit FIREMAN MECCA! a table of fireman dudes having lunch! it was too good to be true. i didn't know what to do. i got nervous. i wanted to approach them, but i was too shy. my heart started beating faster than normal even! thank god for jesse's words of encouragement: 'you have to do this dude. they're firemen! if anyone knows what to do, it's you.'  she was right. i hung up the phone. (even though it's a blackberry and there was nothing to hang it on. that phrase just doesn't make sense anymore.) and took a deep breath.

i KNOW i'm not the first to talk about how sexy firemen are. duh! this is OLD news that carrie bradshaw's already covered! but it's a cliche that's REAL and a stereotype i believe! firemen make you feel sexy and are super attractive even if they AREN'T attractive or your USUAL type at all! i mean, the four people who read this probably find themselves with the skinny pale indie dude time and time again, and i get that! i've lived that! i support that! i'm totally a member of the 'i like dudes that could tip over if you bump into them/get questioned about their sexuality non stop.' so this is probably why my fascination with firemen is even more crazers. they don't have the 'band dude' vibe at all. my genetic coding says i'm not allowed to lust over a fireman dude....and yet i do. and it's not a crime. 

some of them look like ken doll/beef cake/meat heads. but in that red truck and that official uniform, the term beefcake becomes the most appealing thing in the world. oh shit, i'm like samantha jones over here. but i can't stop!

i ALWAYS wave at fire men and they ALWAYS smile when i do. because they KNOW they're sexy. they KNOW they make girls w*t. they rescue people, they have muscles, and a paying job! nuff said! 

the following video doesn't even BEGIN to express the SERIOUSNESS of the sexual prowess of firemen! it's more just me saying: can you believe i stumbled upon a table full of firemen? kuh-razy! soon, i will delve deeper and find a fire house to visit and interview the cutest of the beef head meat cakes or whatever! i love you. xo 

boycrazy video- firemen rule: from alexi wasser on Vimeo.

9 comments:

loveroffashion said...

LA firemen have got nothing on NY firemen...just sayin.

Anonymous said...

you are realllly cool!!!!!

MUSEUM OF STICKERS said...

dude omg that day on the phone with you was the beginning of the rest of my life... oh and NY firemen have nothing on HEMET fireman...oh yeah i fuckin said it!

Anonymous said...

i agree with loveroffashion!

also this is all so great and true... why the fuck DO fire men always smile at me/women??

Anonymous said...

lol @ the fireman who said 'they need a job.'

dude knows whats up.

apocalypstick said...

Alexi Wasser shops in the valley whut??? Yay!

Anonymous said...

You crack me up!! I love that you totally asked them those questions!

Anonymous said...

pretentious as shit...i read about this blog in some horrible ass los angeles magazine i picked up for free...ironic poses, fake indie shit, all this is useless...

boycrazy said...

i know riiiiiiiiiight! xo